A field guide to slows

According to the BBC Scotland News website, the powers that be are asking for public help to count the number of swifts at large in the Cairngorm National Park.

Y-e-s. I think the slight difficulty attaching to that task might be hinted at by the name of the bird in question. "Swift" as in fast and not Swift as in Irish satirist.

But enough negativity. Completely free of charge, here's my three stage classification for quantifying the number of individual birds in a flock of swifts :

1. Nane.
2. More than one
3. Hunners.

I trust that helps.

Now if only the bird experts wanted us to count the number of slows, slows are a skoosh.

"There were hunners here a minute ago, hunners."