New Cardinal- we ask:" Does he know what's in his flowerbeds?"

The Catholic Church in Scotland announced today the appointment of Rome-based bish, Leo Cushley, to replace gay sex liker Cardinal Keith O'Brien.
 A spokescollar for  The Church commented:" Fingers crossed eh? Here we go."

It is thought that if Monsignor Cusley flounces off the Rome flight into Glasgow declaring that being back in Scotland is "just fabulous" then it'll will be back to the drawing board as our Church source confirms: 
"Its a vital part of the job of a senior, attractively costumed, cleric to make public pronouncements on other people's sexuality, preferably condemning people who don't have sex in the approved way- that is, shagging for Jesus.
If this one turns out to be a cassock-lifter as well, we might have to rethink the public lectures on morality model. Which would be a shame, because part of the fun of being religious is being able to think and talk about sex all the time without getting called on it."

What do we think then? Mmm, difficult to call really. Let's see how he
carries off wearing the red dress...