Friday, 15 April 2011

Salmond: Moussa Koussa to face big question

Alex Salmond today confirmed to The JT that exiled Libyan minister Moussa Koussa should be questioned over the Lockerbie affair. 
"al-Megrahi? No, sorry, the name's not ringing any bells."

More specifically, Mr Salmond will seek assurances that  convicted bomber, Abdelbaset al-Megrahi, released on compassionate grounds in August 2009, is now safely dead.

Mr Salmond also told The JT: " I will also be asking Mr Koussa if time moves more slowly in Libya, because Kenny MacAskill was told back in 2009 that al-Megrahi would be dead in 3 months from prostate cancer. Are these lunar months or Jovian?"

Elsewhere, Mr Salmond launched the SNP Holyrood mainfesto, promising that his party would deliver on assurances that the SNP would fund a national football academy. 

He told anyone who'd listen: " Its high time that Scotland had its own football academy, closely modelled on the very successful institution run by the English FA. An academy that  has helped England to a string of  completely unsuccessful appearances in major competitions... actually, just forget  I said anything."

A spokeslace for the Mr Salmond later explained: "Alex mixed up his FAs. He thought he was talking about the English Football Association when in fact he was referring to Fuck All, the sum total of the pay off for England investing in a football academy."

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