It is thought that Mr MacAskill will call upon the Libyan to "fuck off and die" expeditiously, thus getting Mr MacAskill off the hook.
The Justice Secretary will say :" Despite opinion poll evidence to the contrary, I still believe that in releasing Al-Megrahi I expressed the will of the Scottish people in showing mercy. But, enough is enough. I call upon Mr Megrahi to do the decent thing and desist from any further stealing of oxygen forthwith."
It is thought that Mr Megrahi will respond, saying he has got over "that mild touch of cancer" which cleared up completely after a course of antibiotics and a nice sit down.
Mr Megrahi is currently putting the finishing touches to his Freddie Garrity tribute act that will tour Tripoli nite- spots later this year.
Inside: Kenny on the telly saying he couldn't say definitively when Megrahi would "expire". Does Kenny come from the past?