"Bring out your possibly infected... and stick them on the train!"

Train for virus cruise passengers

A 700-seater train has been chartered to take hundreds of passengers from a cruise ship at the centre of a vomiting bug outbreak.

The Marco Polo has been berthed in the Cromarty Firth since Monday.

Train Chartering said it had arranged for the transport to take passengers from Inverness on Thursday to York, Peterborough and London.

Health authorities are advising other passengers at the stations on the route to hold their breath and pray...