Imagine our disquiet, reader dear do, when we discovered that the tradition there in was to play the National Anthem (I told you it was a long time ago) at the commencement of proceedings and not at the conclusion. As you know the latter tradition deploys the opening bars of that hymn to the hereditary principle because it is guaranteed to clear a public place faster than a ringing fire alarm.
But, oh fuckin' no. In this hall, it was played at the start so your editor and SO endured a rather awkward moment with the metaphorical spotlight picking us out, courtesy of us being the only two people left sitting down. Whoo, awkward, as the young people are given to saying...
Which brings me to Songs of Praise, the BBC's weekly prime -time nod to God Bothering. If I happen upon it, in mid-bother as it were, I'm usually quick enough to flip away to another channel with something more interesting on, but last night I found myself caught. The show was on the end-credits and as I was waiting for the news I thought I'll just have to ride this out.
I'm so glad I did because the BBC played a trailer for next week's SoP which I helpfully transcribe in full below:
"Next week Aled (fat, Welsh singy bloke, given to bothering God in Welsh-sounding gibberish) introduces a spectacular Xmas Day big sing from the Royal Albert Hall. There'll be carols aplenty for everyone to sing and festive songs from star guest Chris de Burgh! (Chris De Burgh? Chris De Fuckin' Burgh? Quickly everyone gather round! Chris de Burgh's on the telly!)
So, put your feet up for a very special Songs of Praise and join Aled and 5000 singers for the perfect way to celebrate Xmas!"
Yes, that's right. A winter festival designed around the idea that God was made incarnate and came to Earth to save all our asses and what does the BBC want you to do? Put your feet up.
Now, although I'm no expert on the topic, I would've thought reflecting on The Advent required one to assume a prayerful position just to be on the safe side, but putting your feet up? That's just taking the piss isn't it?
|"And Jesus walked among them saying, I am The Lord your God and everyone just needs to put their feet up and like chill..."|