Sunday, 21 November 2010

Ross Priory explosion- mystery deepens, overtime claims rise...

"Right lads, remember, look busy"

The facts are these. 
At midday last Wednesday, an explosion was heard coming from the Ross Priory Wood, damaging some woodland, outside Gartocharn.
Strathclyde police at the scene have conducted a fingertip search, are pursuing several postitive lines of enquiry and expect the investigation to take some considerable time.

So, what happens next?

  • "Fingertip"search to be followed up with middle and proximal phalanx searches.

  • Leaves lying around thought to be work of previously unknown terrorist cell "The Autumn Winds".

  • After watching the Claims Direct ad on C5 before Tricia, several residents of Gartocharn are now hurriedly  preparing claims for post-facto-post traumatic stress. One resident will tell The JT: " after I saw the news item about the explosion on the telly, I've haven't been able  to sleep until bedtime."

  • Police enquiries likely to continue until decent levels of overtime claims have been amassed. I mean, after Xmas, January is such a long pay month isn't it?
Inside: This is true. A building near the wood is owned an operated by Strathclyde Yooni  and used for functions. I suppose members of the Yooni's Chem Soc can account for their movements on or around the time of the explosion?


John said...

and a gorgeous building it is too!

The Jaggy Thistle said...

And now all we need to ascertain, Dear Watson, is if any of the parties booked in The Priory last week had any foreknowledge or interest in combustible material!Pass me my special phial Watson,there's a good fellow, I fancy doing a line...