Monday, 30 June 2014
Post-facto inference 101
From The Scotsman,
From The JT:
Following the queue experienced by visitors attending the event, "Bannockburn-Delayed", new evidence is emerging that the original battle might have been subject to similar problems.
While historians have traditionally located the battle on or around 24th of June, manuscripts discovered down the back of a very old sofa at the back of the newsagents in Whins of Milton reveal that Bruce was much delayed arriving at the battle by queuing traffic coming off the M9.
Professor Beaker, of Stirling's Department For Appearing On The Telly Looking Windswept And Interesting, told The JT:" Its now clear that such was the queue of armed men turning up to take part in the battle that the battle's start had to be delayed several times with Bruce being forced to apologise to the English-side forced to hang around, sighing heavily and continually checking their hour glasses."
Shock was recorded amongst members of a local battle reenactment society who thought they were taking part in a pretend battle.
In actual combat, re-enacters found that hitting your opponent in arms with a wooden sword covered in kitchen foil had little effect and resulted in severe reciprocal malky...
According to the later chronicler, Blind Willie McTell, "Great were the cries of ooh yah that hurts ya bastard, followed by the screams of dying for real."
Sunday, 29 June 2014
Friday, 27 June 2014
From The Skinstman: see, what you've got to realise
is that the Germans understand the meaning of the term "serene" in a slightly different way from us...
Tuesday, 24 June 2014
Thursday, 19 June 2014
"You see, young fella,
back in the days before all these fancy internet doings, this result is what we'd call a coupon burster..."
Tuesday, 17 June 2014
Monday, 16 June 2014
While according to a Scotsman poll
many Scots think there will be bad feeling after the referendum, Skeletor, sans hood, is totally cool with it...
Sunday, 15 June 2014
Things to understand about football
Top strikers,Heat and Humidity, will always be playing against England in every match, as will the wily midfielder, El Nino...
Friday, 13 June 2014
Thursday, 12 June 2014
JK Rowling
Wednesday, 11 June 2014
Tuesday, 10 June 2014
Sunday, 8 June 2014
Monday, 2 June 2014
Keane to remain assistant coach, practice spells
Roy Keane the completely sane assistant coach with The Republic's national team has turned down a chance to manage Celtic.
He told The JT: " The Celtic job would really cut into the time I need to practice spells since becoming a wizard."
Mr Keane can be seen below acting to levitate the entire Republic midfield past Italian friendly opposition. While no one actually witnessed any vertical movement part from Mr Keane, everyone present heartily agreed with Mr Keane's assessment that it "really fookin' happened roight?" while studiously avoiding eye-contact...
"Roise in da air, Oi command yew!"
He told The JT: " The Celtic job would really cut into the time I need to practice spells since becoming a wizard."
Mr Keane can be seen below acting to levitate the entire Republic midfield past Italian friendly opposition. While no one actually witnessed any vertical movement part from Mr Keane, everyone present heartily agreed with Mr Keane's assessment that it "really fookin' happened roight?" while studiously avoiding eye-contact...
"Roise in da air, Oi command yew!"
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)